We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
The beer is more important than you right now.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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