I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Randomize
