I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
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