Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Randomize
