My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
When are your genitals available?
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
