About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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