I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
The adults are the big ones right?
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
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