all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
So many bounce houses so little time
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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