I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
