Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
