It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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