Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
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