so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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