Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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