just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Houston, we have a blender
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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