last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
