It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
