just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
