jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
