I just pynch a tree in the face
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
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