Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
