Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I just threw up on my dentist
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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