Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Randomize
