Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November