I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
