That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Randomize
