Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
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