sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
