Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
