He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
