I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
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He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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