What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
It's never too late to be topless.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
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