Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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