Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
