yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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