I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
