Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
