omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Is it because I queefed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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