You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
