how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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