Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize