This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Randomize
