my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
