Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
