Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
