Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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