I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
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