Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize
