I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Randomize
