Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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