You work out of a Hotel?
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I love you. Go after that dick
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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